Friendships: Houses in our society (Essay)

When you go for a walk, you often pass familiar facades that you have known for years. The arrangement of windows and doors can make a house look like a face. Some houses look friendly, while others look rather forbidding. Over time, these houses develop a personality of their own. They seem like faces you have known for a long time.

The changing seasons are reflected in the windows. Decorations change, or a window remains dark for a long time until someone turns on the light again. Tiny houses assert themselves among the chic villas of the suburbs, like poor relatives. You want to applaud them for being so brave.

Apartment blocks stand like rocks in the cityscape. They are huge landmarks, but they obstruct the wider view. Familiar cosiness lines the paths you walk along. You know some of them well, but you know far less about others, because they don't know how to sneak into your line of sight.

Then, suddenly, demolition! A house you knew, whose windows had long been dark, with faded posters displaying a phone number and the words 'For sale' in bold print, has lost its 'head'. You can see inside the house. It's like seeing an acquaintance standing naked in the street. The house reveals its inner workings. You want to look away, but you can't.

A house is something that becomes alive itself through the life it encloses and protects. Whether it's an apartment block, a detached house or a villa, they all have a history and a character of their own. A house is a refuge, a shelter, a home, and perhaps even a friend – all rolled into one.

Destroyed house in Croatia

Perhaps that is why photos of natural disasters or war showing half-collapsed houses are so harrowing. Houses are split almost in two, with disaster striking right through the living room. You can see people's furniture, wallpaper, and everyday items that are none of your business, as if someone had pulled the duvet off them while they were sleeping peacefully. Everything that is most private and sacred has been torn apart without hesitation. The walls that offered protection are gone.

Houses are more than just places to live, especially ones that stand out as being special in some way. Perhaps it's a striking growth of ivy, wild vines or special shutters that draw our attention to them. Do they take on the attitude of their inhabitants? Who knows – maybe they do. Then again, perhaps we project something onto them. For instance, we might project something onto them because of the cheerful red flowers in the window boxes or the tricycle in the front garden that brings back memories.

The small building site with the demolition hut probably won't remain undeveloped for long. Whether what will stand there will one day will become a familiar sight remains to be seen. Let's wait and see.

© 'Friendships: Houses in our society. Some people love looking at houses': An essay by Pressenet (translated by Izabel Comati), 01/2026. The pictures show a cat at a window (top) and a destroyed house in a Croatian war zone (bottom).